Pitty Pot

Grumble, Moan, Groan, Complain and Whine. That pretty much sums up the content of this update. Sitting here tonight at the computer I catch myself starting and restarting, writing, and rewriting, yet each “revision” contains the same content. I feel as though I am divided into two people; one part of me feels like a petulant child ready to throw a temper-tantrum, the other part is the voice of reason and reality, struggling to be heard over the commotion of the first part. Can anyone relate, or is this condition unique to my miserable self?

I am wavering, teeter-tottering back and forth, which part will win out?

Part one: I am tired. Enough said.
Part two: it has been a fulfilling day, filled with memory making moments.

Part one: my floor is literally crawling right now. I can squash three baby roaches by lifting my sandal and pressing down half an inch away.
Part two: at least the mosquitoes aren’t biting.

Part one: I have “flu” – you know, the condition caused by too much coldness, too much dust, too much (insert any other ‘obvious’ cause of “flu” here in Uganda)
Part two: this just plain sucks.

Part one: snot faced child whose name literally translated is “Remember Elvis”. Literally snot faced, and super annoying…
Part two: Benja boy…. Ok, part two wins this round.

Part one: this could go on all night….
Part two: so not healthy to dwell, moan, groan, and complain….

You catch my drift? I am wavering, teeter-tottering back and forth.

It has been a good week and an emotional week for me. I have been struggling with being kind to certain individuals who quite simply, drive me up the wall. Of course I then struggle with the “right-ness” of feeling as I feel towards them; translation- I get irked with them, then irked with myself for getting irked in the first place, then irked that they keep irking me. At times like this I find myself wanting a mom hug, cause moms hug you even when you are being a snot. I have been a snot all week, and I can’t help but wonder if “Remember Elvis” is here in part, to remind me how unattractive being a snot really is.

One thing I have always struggled with is being “like a duck”. Are you familiar with that phrase? My mom always encouraged me to be like a duck and let things roll off my back. Water rolls off the ducks because of oil on their feathers (or something like that) so it doesn’t bother them. Not easy for me, unlike ducks, I get soaked. Unfortunately I am a slow thinker at times, so I am miserable and soaked and can’t figure out why I am miserable…. And it seems that once I get a little wet I get drenched. This week I have been told by three different people that I need to start being more physically active because I am “too much round”, I have “too much fatness” from a boy who then proceeded to pat my stomach, and because I wouldn’t be able to run away if an army invaded. The whole invading army thing was easy enough to shake off… I only got a little wet… but the second and then the third comment got me pretty wet. When wet and miserable I find myself turning snarky; which may in fact be more unattractive than too much roundness. (The jury is still out on this though…) So on a completely shallow, personal level; it has been a bit of a rough week.

Snarky and Snotty. Excellent combination. Really puts me in an excellent place for ministering to hurting children and adults. Brilliant.

Good things this week:1) found out that my visa for staying in UG has been approved. Had to make a quick trip to Kampala to finalize the paperwork. It was exhausting. Crossed town about six times because the various “officials” we spoke to kept forgetting to give us all the info. Jumped through all the hoops, paid the application fee, and turned in my passport for the actual visa. Told to come back in five business days. {This detail could actually go under the “Not so Good Things This Week” paragraph- Kampala sucks. Travelling to Kampala sucks.}

2) Bluffed my way through giving the children haircuts. By “bluffed” I mean… I confidently told them to hold still as I shaved their heads as though I were a pro, having never shaved black hair before it was quite an experience. Lots of shiny heads now!!

3) Good talks with the kids

4) Play time with Benja; his new thing is holding something in his hands and having you guess which hand contains the item. He can play this endlessly; he thinks I am incredible because I always guess the correct hand “you eat me!!” he laughs. (I can’t tell if he is meaning “you beat me” or if he is using “eat” like defeat…. Cause if you win at cards you “eat” the others… weird English here)

5) Fresh milk daily: from our cow patience. Boiled over the firewood stove and poured into a thermos for enjoying throughout the day.

See, it always helps telling you about the good things, I am feeling better already as I am remembering the nice things from throughout the week. Part two may win out after all…
Please pray for me. The school holiday is coming to an end and we will be heading back to the village. It won’t be good heading back there in a snarky and snotty mood.